Sufi Humor-Hodja jokes

When I grew up in Turkey as a child, we always heard of the tales of Nasreddin Hodja, his jokes were always about life and thought provoking. If you visit Turkey today, and ask anyone, they will all know of Nasreddin Hodja (pronounced as hoja)and most likely tell you a tale. The tradition of Sufism includes endless funny stories, usually on and about ourselves. The book that I am getting these stories from, encourages the reader to identify one's self in every story, to acknowledge that you too could be as foolish or as lacking in discernment as the characters in these classic tales. These stories are from traditional (old ) Turkish story collections.
p.s. The word Hodja ( Hoja) also is a word used to identify a teacher.

Enjoy, Peace and Blessings

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"I can see in the dark," boasted Hodja one day while sitting in a tea shop."

"If that's true," said his friends, "why do we sometimes see you carrying a light at night?"

"Well," he replied, "I only use that lamp to prevent other people from bumping into me."
***
One day a friend asked Hodja for a loan, saying that he would repay him the following week. Hodja didn't believe him but gave him the money anyway. Much to his surprise, the man kept his word and repaid him.

A few months later the same man wanted another loan from Hodja, and he said to him, "You know my credit is good. Last time, I repaid you promptly."

"You're not going to get the money this time,"said Hodja. "You deceived me last time by repaying me when I thought that you wouldn't. I am not going to let you fool me again."
***
Hodja wanted to learn how to play the lute. So he approached a music teacher and asked him, "How much do you charge for private lute lessons?"

"Three silver pieces for the first month; then after that, one silver piece a month."

"Oh, that's very fair, " exclaimed Hodja. "I'll start with the second month".
***

One day a poor hungry man was passing through the streets with only a piece of bread in his hand. As he passed by a restaurant, he saw some delicious-looking meatballs frying in a pan. He waved his bread over the pan for a few seconds, and then he ate it. The restaurant owner had seen what he did and grabbed him by the neck and dragged him before the judge, who happened to be Hodja.

The restaurant owner demanded that this poor peasant pay for the price of the meatballs.
Hodja listened carefully and then took two coins from his pocket and told him, "Come and stand by me a minute." The restaurant owner obeyed, and Hodja shook his fist so that the coins made a rattling sound in the man's ear.

"What are you doing this for?" he asked

Hodja replied, "I have just paid you for the meatballs. Surely the sound of money if fair payment for the smell of food."

***
One day a friend visited Hodja and said, "Hodja, I want to borrow your donkey."
"I'm sorry, " replied Hodja, "but, I've already lent it out to someone else."
As soon as he said this, the donkey brayed.

"But Hodja,I can hear the donkey! It's in the stable."

Shutting the door in this friend's face, Hodja told him with dignity, "A man who believes the word of a donkey above my own doesn't deserve to be lent anything!"

***
One day Hodja was heartbroken over the loss of his dear wife. All his neighbors and friends tried to encourage and comfort him by saying, "don't worry about her, Hodja we'll help you to find and even better one."

A short while later his donkey died as well. Hodja seemed to mourn the donkey even more than he had his wife.

Some of his friends noticed this and approached him concerning this matter, and he replied, "When my wife passed away, all my friends promised me that they would find an even better one for me, but so far no one has offered to replace my donkey."
***
For some reason the people of Aksehir became very angry with Hodja and wanted to expel him from the town. They complained to the magistrate so that he was forced to summon Hodja. He said to him, "Hodja, the people of this town don't like you. They all want you to move."
"It is I who don't like the people here," replied Hodja. "As far as I'm concerned, they can all leave."
"But they are many and you are one," said the magistrate.
"Well, because they are many it is even easier for them. They can all work together and build a village wherever they decide to go. But how can I, all alone and at my age, build a new home and cultivate a field in the country?"

***

Thoughts of Wonder

The Prophet Abraham grew up among idol worshippers. He sought to find God. He looked at the brightest stars and said, " You are my Lord." Then the full moon came out . It was far bigger and brighter than any of the stars. Abraham looked at the moon and said, "You are my Lord." Then the sun came u, and the moon and stars disappeared. Abraham said, "You are the greatest, You are my Lord." Then night came, and the sun disappeared.
Abraham said, "My Lord if the One who changes things and who brings them back. My Lord is the One who is behind all changes."
--- Sheikh Muzaffer ---

It is said that when you take only one step toward Him, He advances ten steps toward you. Bu the complete truth is that God is always with you.
--- Muhammad ---

One day a dervish came to Attar's Pharmacy. He saw the clutter and display; he smelled he heady scent of herbs and perfumes; then he heaved a deep sigh and began to weep.
Disturbed by such odd sight, Attar asked the dervish to move on.
The Dervish replied, "all right Sir. My load is light, nothing more than this old garment I am wearing. But you, Attar, my heart aches for you! When the time comes for you to depart, how are you giong to carry all these goods?" ---Farzan ---

***
When you see my funeral, don't say, "What a separation!"
It is time for me to visit and meet the Beloved.
Since you have seen my descent, hen do see my rising.
Why complain about the setting of the moon and the sun?
Which seed that went under the earth failed to grow up again? -----Rumi ------

***

Is Something Missing?

Anyone can say anything.
Eyes look without obstruction,
and the nose, it sniffs everything.

Lets go where they want to. Hands reach.
The mind respects nothing. Even the heart
is unsure where to stand. This is how
things are. Is something missing?

A human being can walk in different ways.
Delibaretly, as though going somewhere,
or strolling with no purpose, or marching,
or limping, or pretending to be a gorilla
with arms hanging down.

He or she can curse you or trust you, comfort you,
or act without considering anything or anyone.
Truth and lies, both glitter in the eyes.
He or she can hear and enjoy and embrace
the language coming in, but to understand everything
with divine wisdom is hard.

There is one clear truth, the pure loving.
When people do not have that, they are
disconnected. Words are just words,
and good actions are done for wrong reasons.

Paint on a red dot like the dancing Shiva,
but if you don't know how to open your heart
with modesty, dignity, and respect for others,
it's just collecting more honors and robes.

It's easy to explain the condition of being human,
what's missing and what's here, but if
you don't know a God exists,
it's foolishness.

To know this and act accordingly is difficult.
Saying the words is easy.

--- Bawa Muhaiyaddeen ---

Love all and hate none.
Mere talk of peace will avail you naught.
Mere talk of God and Religion will not take you far.
Be a blazing fire of truth,
be a beauteous blossom of love
and be a soothing balm of peace.
With your spiritual light, dispel the darkness of ignorance;
dissolve the clouds of discord and war
and spread goodwill, peace, and harmony among the people.
Never seek any help, charity, or favors
from anybody except God.
Never go to the courts of kings,
but never refuse to bless and help the needy and the poor,
the widow, and the orphan, if they come to your door.
This is your mission, to serve the people...
Carry it out dutifully and courageously,
so that I , as your spiritual teacher,
may not be ashamed of any shortcomings on your part
before the Almighty God and our holy predecessors
in the Sufi Order
on the day of Judgment.

--- Hazrat Khuaja ---

Happy is the who is able to escape from the lower self and feel the gentle breeze of friendship. His heart is so full of the Beloved that there is no longer room for anyone else. he Beloved flows through his every vein and nerve. Every atom of his body is filled with the Friend.

The true lovers can no longer perceive either the scent or the color of their own selves. They have no interest in anything other than the Beloved. Their heart is attached neither to throne or crown. Greed and lust have packed their bags and left their street. If they speak, it is to the Friend. If they seek, it is from the Friend. They no longer take themselves into account, and live only for love. They leave the raw and turn to the ripe, abandoning completely the abode of the self.

---Jami---

Sufism

About Sufism (Gathered from Books on Sufism)



Sufism offers one a path to Self-realization, or God-realization. Sufism is about Love, Devotion and a way of knowledge. Sufism has been described as the mystical core of Islam and date its appearance to the beginnings of Islam, at about 9Th Century A.D. However, according to many Sufis, the essential Truths of Sufism exists in all religions.

A person who practices Sufism is called a Sufi, or dervish, or faquir. Sufi has several meanings in Arabic, "pure" and "wool". Sufis wore simple cloaks in addition to seeking inner purity. Dervish is a Persian word, relating to "door" , because, in the old times Dervishes used to go from door to door begging for food or a place to stay. It also means one who is at the threshold (between awareness of this world and awareness of the Divine ). Faqir is Arabic for a poor person. In Sufism this does not refer to those poor in worldly/material goods, but to those who are "spiritually poor" that is, those whose hearts are empty of attachment to anything other than God. They realize that they have nothing, that they can do nothing, that they are nothing without God. They rely on nothing in this world, only on God.

Although, Sufism is most prominent in Middle East. Today, Sufis are scattered among all nations of the world.

These are the Tenets of Sufism:

I believe in God,
And in God's angels,
And in the Holy Books,
And in God's Messengers,
And in the Day of Resurrection,
And in destiny,
That all good and bad come from God,
And that there is life after this life.


Sufism maintains that you don't have to look for God anywhere but in your heart. Sufis believe in four great Books: The Torah, brought by Moses, the Psalms of David, the Gospels inspired by Jesus, and the Koran revealed to Muhammad. Sufis also believe that in addition to these scriptures, there have been hundreds of shorter scrolls revealed to the prophets. Each prophet bringing the same truth from the same Divine source, and therefore we have to believe in all of them. Those prophets who have brought a book are known as Messengers.

***
Huston Smith calls Sufis the "impatient ones", those who are not willing to wait to be reunited with Divinity at death but hunger for union now. "Why the rush?" the rest of us might inquire. Who looks forward with equanimity to his or her own death?
If you accept the premise that life and death are both gifts, then the prospect of death can become more a source of wonder than a cause of fear. It is difficult for us to think this way in our American culture, because we are phobic about death, just as the ancient Egyptians were. We make our dead look as good or better than they did in life, and preserving their flesh in soft padded container, only to bury them like anyone else. For this reason it is difficult to see death as a gift in our American culture, unless if we change our thoughts and beliefs.

What do you take with you into the city of death? Not a suitcase, not a purse, not even the pictures in your wallet. Nothing goes with you except the sum of what your life has been.

A sufi teaching says, "Die before you die," one interpretation is that you should strive to learn what you woiuld be shown at death while you still have time to make use of this knowledge, that is, while still alive in a body. The wisdom we achieve on death reveals the true value of what is important and what is not. How much richer life becomes if we are able to gain this perspective beforehand.

***


If you could get rid
Of yourself just once,
The secret of secrets
Would open to you.
The face of the unknown,
Hidden beyond the universe
Would appear on the
Mirror of your perception.
--- Rumi ---


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There are hundreds of books on Sufism, and reader of these blogs are encouraged to seek them if it is desired.

The Stone grows old.
Eternity is not for stones.
But I shall go down from this airy space, this swift
white peace, this stinging exultation;
And time will close about me, and my soul stir to the rhythm
of the daily round.
Yet, having known, life will no press so close.
And always I shall feel time ravel thin about me.
For once I stood
in the white windy presence of eternity.