Sufi Humor-Hodja jokes

When I grew up in Turkey as a child, we always heard of the tales of Nasreddin Hodja, his jokes were always about life and thought provoking. If you visit Turkey today, and ask anyone, they will all know of Nasreddin Hodja (pronounced as hoja)and most likely tell you a tale. The tradition of Sufism includes endless funny stories, usually on and about ourselves. The book that I am getting these stories from, encourages the reader to identify one's self in every story, to acknowledge that you too could be as foolish or as lacking in discernment as the characters in these classic tales. These stories are from traditional (old ) Turkish story collections.
p.s. The word Hodja ( Hoja) also is a word used to identify a teacher.

Enjoy, Peace and Blessings

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"I can see in the dark," boasted Hodja one day while sitting in a tea shop."

"If that's true," said his friends, "why do we sometimes see you carrying a light at night?"

"Well," he replied, "I only use that lamp to prevent other people from bumping into me."
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One day a friend asked Hodja for a loan, saying that he would repay him the following week. Hodja didn't believe him but gave him the money anyway. Much to his surprise, the man kept his word and repaid him.

A few months later the same man wanted another loan from Hodja, and he said to him, "You know my credit is good. Last time, I repaid you promptly."

"You're not going to get the money this time,"said Hodja. "You deceived me last time by repaying me when I thought that you wouldn't. I am not going to let you fool me again."
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Hodja wanted to learn how to play the lute. So he approached a music teacher and asked him, "How much do you charge for private lute lessons?"

"Three silver pieces for the first month; then after that, one silver piece a month."

"Oh, that's very fair, " exclaimed Hodja. "I'll start with the second month".
***

One day a poor hungry man was passing through the streets with only a piece of bread in his hand. As he passed by a restaurant, he saw some delicious-looking meatballs frying in a pan. He waved his bread over the pan for a few seconds, and then he ate it. The restaurant owner had seen what he did and grabbed him by the neck and dragged him before the judge, who happened to be Hodja.

The restaurant owner demanded that this poor peasant pay for the price of the meatballs.
Hodja listened carefully and then took two coins from his pocket and told him, "Come and stand by me a minute." The restaurant owner obeyed, and Hodja shook his fist so that the coins made a rattling sound in the man's ear.

"What are you doing this for?" he asked

Hodja replied, "I have just paid you for the meatballs. Surely the sound of money if fair payment for the smell of food."

***
One day a friend visited Hodja and said, "Hodja, I want to borrow your donkey."
"I'm sorry, " replied Hodja, "but, I've already lent it out to someone else."
As soon as he said this, the donkey brayed.

"But Hodja,I can hear the donkey! It's in the stable."

Shutting the door in this friend's face, Hodja told him with dignity, "A man who believes the word of a donkey above my own doesn't deserve to be lent anything!"

***
One day Hodja was heartbroken over the loss of his dear wife. All his neighbors and friends tried to encourage and comfort him by saying, "don't worry about her, Hodja we'll help you to find and even better one."

A short while later his donkey died as well. Hodja seemed to mourn the donkey even more than he had his wife.

Some of his friends noticed this and approached him concerning this matter, and he replied, "When my wife passed away, all my friends promised me that they would find an even better one for me, but so far no one has offered to replace my donkey."
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For some reason the people of Aksehir became very angry with Hodja and wanted to expel him from the town. They complained to the magistrate so that he was forced to summon Hodja. He said to him, "Hodja, the people of this town don't like you. They all want you to move."
"It is I who don't like the people here," replied Hodja. "As far as I'm concerned, they can all leave."
"But they are many and you are one," said the magistrate.
"Well, because they are many it is even easier for them. They can all work together and build a village wherever they decide to go. But how can I, all alone and at my age, build a new home and cultivate a field in the country?"

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